he question has been coming up in various forums, 'When is John Ringo going to have another red-shirt contest?'

The answer is: Now.

The requirements for being a redshirt:

Prove worthiness of the individual to be immortalized by dying screaming at the hands of alien or metaphysical (currently working on a Special Circumstances) creatures by contributing to the greatness of John Ringo and the spread of the RingoMeme (TM).
:-)

(I may have as part of the climax of one of the stories most of Delta taken out by a Lovecraftian Old One.)

For those who have a bit of pocket change (that's not being used to buy my books) the quickest and easiest way is to buy a 'OHJOHNRINGONO' t-shirt.

http://www.cafepress.com/ohjohnringono

(Explanation of the 'OHJOHNRINGONO' meme can be found in earlier posts.)

I would not have suggested this route were it not for the fact that the proceeds go to the Helen Bamber Foundation in the name of Tamara Long. (For further explanation, see the website.)

There were at one point RingoRedshirts t-shirts around. I'll see if any of those can be aquired or put them on my own CafePress. (Yes, I have one albeit not a very interesting one. It's just covers.)

You can also get Last Centurion 'stuff' from the Centurion site, create your own 'Ringo' creation, prove that you've gotten the meme spread in other ways, etc. ("I hooked the entire college cheerleading squad on Ghost!" will get you tuckerized as a major character. :-)

Military personnel don't have to do any of the above. If you're a currently serving member of the military, a 'contractor' in a hot-zone or other (government civilian, non-shooter contractor) who's having to deal with shots fired in anger, just drop a line. You're in like flint.

My promise is this:

I promise nothing.
:-)

I will attempt to include you in a book. You may be 'Tuckerized' (ongoing character) to be killed at a later time. You may be a redshirt with no more mention than 'We lost Ziggy.' I will try for some characterization but I make no promises.

The one salient point is that a character trait, description, unusual nickname or anything else 'personalizing' makes it more likely (no guarantee) a. to be used and b. to be used in a notable way. Stephen Blankemeier, the heroic Captain and then Admiral 'Specter' Blankemeier was just a guy from the previous red-shirt competition. The nickname caught my eye, it sounded like the sort of thing a fighter jock would use, that created the character of a fighter jock as the CO of a submarine in space and hilarity ensued. By the same token, Eric Bergstresser was also from the previous competition and I just picked the name at random. Ditto Kurt Schwenke, the evil former STAZI villain in Ghost.

I do not guarantee a particular use. Don't ask. If you do anyway, ('Can I, like, be a sniper?') know that it reduces the chance of using the character. I also get full use of the name and character, at this time and in the future for any purposes whatsoever.

To report on your worthiness, preferably with some proofs (receipt from cafe-press, pictures, emails and phone numbers of the cheerleaders) send an email to:

ringoredshirts@gmail.com

Oh, and keep the emails short, please. Just salient information. Thanks.

Anyone asking questions about 'when is book x going to be out' will not necessarily be dropped from the list but will also not improve their chances for immortalization. The answer is either on the schedule (www.simonsays.com is usually the most up-to-date) or 'whenever/maybe'.


Take care,



John

s previously posted, a blogger wrote a very long piece on the Ghost series. It is brutally honest and at the same time funny, a very good look at Mike Harmon in that way. There are several very good tag-lines in it ("He collects hookers like an old lady collects cats!") but OH JOHN RINGO NO! has caught on as one of those internet memes.

Several of his readers wanted t-shirts with the tagline which has expanded to mean anything in a book that defines 'Did you really have to go there?' So he now has a CafePress site (with my permission) selling the t-shirts. They depict the classic conversation between Mike, Courtney and Courtney's Mom in Thunder Island.

http://www.cafepress.com/ohjohnringono

Not to be outdone, the proceeds go to the Helen Bamber Fund which works to get women out of prostitution and sexual slavery. And they're donated in the name of Captain Tamara Long, USAF.

You can't get much more classy than that, people.

So drag your asses over there and get some t-shirts. Or not, I know not everybody a. appreciates the joke and b. has the money to spend. But if you do, know that it's going to a worthwhile cause.


Take care,



John

For those of you who have never heard of The Onion... Shame on you!

The Onion is a 'satirical newspaper' that normally takes current events and writes articles that look like real articles but are clearly satire.

A few weeks ago, I got posted a link to their new 'Video News' section which was an 'argument' between a 9/11 conspiracy theorist and an Al Qaeda spokesman who was VERY upset that anyone would think Al Qaeda didn't blow up the Twin Towers. (Yes, sick, but deeply funny at the same time.

Now there's this:


Al-Qaida No. 2 says 9/11 theory propagated by Iran
By MAGGIE MICHAEL, Associated Press Writer Tue Apr 22, 11:24 AM ET
Osama bin Laden's chief deputy in an audiotape Tuesday accused Shiite Iran of trying to discredit the Sunni al-Qaida terror network by spreading the conspiracy theory that Israel was behind the Sept. 11 attacks.

And this is the video.

Onion Scoops Zawahiri
Tue, Apr 22, 2008 at 9:55:58 am PST
Bumpy Zawahiri's denunciation of the Troofer idiots was predicted by that highly reputable news source, The Onion: 9/11 Conspiracy Theories 'Ridiculous,' Al Qaeda Says.


We live in a very weird world.

There is a VERY good review of Ghost, Kildar and Choosers over at this link:

Let me say in advance that I agree totally and unashamedly. I even posted a comment saying so.

Very much worth reading. Go give the guy some click throughs.
:-)

('He collects hookers like CATS!')
:-)



John

Tammy was a beautiful woman I saw, never met, at one of my first DragonCons dressed in a laser cut leather 'succubus' outfit. Tall brunette, fit, high-heels and just fricking hot.

more...

Five new Convention Dates have been posted. See the events page for details and dates.

AggieCon
SoonerCon
LibertyCon
DragonCon
WindyCon

All I can say is 'Damnit.' It's selfish of me to take this particular position but just about the time I'm getting to the point I can meet people I'd never dreamed of being able to meet... they're dying off.

Damnit.

People talk forever of 2001 but what I remember of Clarke is things like 'The City and the Stars' and his other short story collections. Stories like 'Childhood's End', 'The Deep Range' (one of the best undersea novels ever written), 'The Nine Billion Names of God' and, of course, 'Tales From the White Hart' which proved that SF and humor could not only be combined but combined amazingly well. (TftWH was the original for the Callahan books and, IMO, was never improved upon. Sorry, Spider. Harry Purvis is just hard to beat.)

Clarke was nearly as influential to me as Heinlein. I recall finding the collection 'From the Ocean, From the Stars' in about ninth grade and going on a Clarke Frenzy that lasted most of the year. Great, great, great stuff.

Finding that he'd been added as a 'friend' in MySpace was damned near the highlight of 2007. And now he's gone.

Damnit, damnit, damnit.



John

----------

Last odyssey for sci-fi guru Arthur C. Clarke

COLOMBO (AFP) — Science fiction author Arthur C. Clarke, who died Wednesday aged 90, captured the world's imagination with his vision of the future in books such as "2001: A Space Odyssey" and predicted communication satellites.

Born in Britain, Clarke had lived in Sri Lanka for more than half a century, holed up in an "electronic cottage" from which he communicated with the world via a battery of monitors, radios and computer keyboards.

The Aggiecon website is at http://aggiecon.tamu.edu/?q=aggiecon if you want to find out more

I haven't been exactly all over the Elliott Spitzer thing (although glad as hell that he finally got taken down for various reasons.) And I don't usually read Ann Coulter. In general agree with her positions but she really does come across as a haridan and it's not an image of conservatives I support.

However, she really nailed the Spitzer thing. Short take: He's an 'elite' NYC Jew boy. For someone like that, there could not have been anything as destructive as getting caught with a call girl.

http://www.humanevents.com/
article.php?id=25481

Unless it's getting gipped by a callgirl. A thousand bucks an hour for this? Good God.

http://www.nytimes.com/

Having written and researched prostitution as thoroughly as any author I know... She's two-fifty an hour, max. Even in NYC.

Spitzer not only got screwed, he got gipped while being screwed.

How utterly embarassing.

Don't get all up in arms about this one. But I thought I'd include another of my standard complaints just to put something on the website since nothing much is going on.

And I thought it was a good reply.

This is sort of a general update on why there hasn't been an update.
:-)

There haven't been many changes to the website, including schedule and book schedule updates, because Tim is planning a major revision in the near future. The details of the revision are still being worked out, but that's why no major updates.

Toooooo much time on their hands. But the video is funny as hell.
The Disintegrator. A 24-barrel, tripod-mountable monster rubberband gun.

And, yes, I want one.

'Toni appreciates all the interest in Hank's condition. She's busy trying to juggle staying by his side and running Baen at the same time. So send all the prayers you can muster but otherwise let her be and she'll inform everyone when there's good news.'

First a scheduling note. I'm going to be GoH at TusCon in Tucson in early November. So all you people who are complaining I only do east and west coast... I hit somewhere in the middle!
:-)

I promise a DragonCon report soon. There is much to talk about. My problem is DragonCon is a bit like the '60s: If you were there you don't remember it. :-) But this is more on the SCRIBD thing. I picked up a blog response about it which was well reasoned and I thought I should respond more broadly.

On the SCRIBD thing...

And in the same triage of email I had three saying 'Ghost/Kildar Rock!' Which means (and it's indicated by sales as well) that it's my most popular series. Since I write mostly to tell the story and entertain, that means I'm somewhat committed to the characters and story...

The base of this essay was in response to being invited back to StellarCon next year. Due to some 'issues' at the con, I had decided not to attend next year. That is still up in the air but after explaining my 'issues' I then got into why the issues came about.

I've been avoiding writing this missive, mostly because I wasn't sure anyone involved wanted any more attention paid.

A friend of mine who is the basis for Captain Kacey Bathlick ("Dragon") in UTB and ADB attends DragonCon every year. This year, she suggested that as a lark one of her costumes might be based on her Keldara character. Since it's easy (digicam, a Keldara patch and one that says "Bathlick") she's probably going to do it.

That got us thinking. (Aaaaaah!)

Spring has sprung and with it the expected outpouring of "when is the next x book coming out." I don't know why people choose spring to spring this on me but it's getting to be a pattern. So, once again, here is the "not a schedule schedule" of forthcoming books and books in progress.

What I've been doing instead of writing.

This is going to be long. Much of it is highly extraneous. There's a huge cut and paste of my dealings with MS tech support, both by email and chat. You can read it if you want a good chuckle.

As some of you might have heard, my new computer that I was complaining about getting up and running promptly crashed while I was on vacation. In the Atlanta Airport , lest you think it was exposure to horrible conditions. The backlight of the LCD screen blew out for reasons unknown.

So, along with my most recent computer woes, I figured I'd write about the ski trip. With the exception of the computer going out, it was a good trip. Great, to be more precise...

I've gotten some interesting emails regarding my previous essay on Europe. There are two things I'd like to add, one a link to an article on the Wall Street Journal site (I think it requires registration) and the other is an analysis someone sent me on Nobel prizes.

Dear All

My MySpace account, which apparently is powered by zombie chinchillas, took it upon itself to spam a large number of other MySpace accounts. It was not "hacked" and the exact method by which it occurred is still under investigation. In the interim, some of the chinchillas, chosen at random, have been buried in a crossroads with rock salt in their mouths and the latter sewn shut pour encourage l'autre. With luck the rest of them will get the hint. But, they are zombies after all and not given to introspection. If it happens again, you're free to do the same.

John

This is going to be really long. Get a drink, smoke 'em if you got 'em. T'was a memorable evening. I'll leave it at "memorable" for now. Note I didn't say "great" or "terrible" because it was, well, both...

I was sent an article about anti-Americanism written by a Romanian extraction professor in Michigan. I'll skip reducing some of the standard academic tropes about the Bush administration and the "evils" of our present war. I will say that he lays out the current and past conditions of anti-Americanism well, but it's when he comes to the conclusions that he falters. He simply cannot see the forest for the trees....

It was a dark and stormy night...

Prepare for a tirade...

So, went skiing again in NH. Came back with all members of the party battered and one broken...

Hi, My Name Is John and... I'm a computer abuser!
(Sob!)

When 9/11 hit my immediate reaction was to re-enlist...

...and you don't believe it.

So people have been wondering what's going on, why haven't they heard from their favorite author/brother/son/boyfriend/dad?

Hey all. I got an email from an acquaintance with a name you might recognize: John Mullins.

John's an interesting guy. He was the advisor for the SOF video game and the game designers ended up changing the main character to him. Even visually, albeit when he was much younger. And the CV on the video game is accurate right up to the "Shop" part. John was in about anything scarily dangerous you can name in Vietnam. Also a polite and fascinating guy to have a beer with although you always leave the conversation with the vague feeling that you're glad you're still alive.

Anyway, John's apparently been doing some books in the "Men of Valor" series. If there's ever been a writer that's "been there, done that" it's Mullins.

The new one coming out is "Bayonet Skies." If my fine wing'ed minions have any book money left over, you might want to check it out.

I'm planning a long update post, soon. Just as soon as I get all the stuff out of the way that I'll be updating.

John

An appreciation letter from a soldier.

"As many of you reading this know, Jim Baen, who was not only the man who first published me but a powerhouse in the science fiction field died recently.

"I had thought to keep this a secret for a while. But given the grieving over Jim's passing, I think it's a good time to announce it.

Shortly after Jim's death, I got a call from Toni on "business matters." To ensure the health of the company, Jim had instructed that "while he was still warm" Baen should get contract agreements from its major authors.

I suggested a couple of contracts but knew in my heart the one that Jim would want me to offer. And then, as I was talking to Toni, I had an epiphany.

Therefore, I would like to announce that I will be signing a contract for three new Mike O'Neal novels.

They will have to wait for the two remaining Cally's Universe novels and one from me set in the pre-Hell's Faire time period. But I now have the issues with the continuing series resolved to my satisfaction. It should run to more than three/four books (possibly as high as nine) and I will get started on them as soon as possible.

It's what Jim would have wanted me to do."